Relationships, particularly long-term ones, can be challenging at times. Dealing with family difficulties, work worries, health concerns, betrayals and the ups and downs of day-to-day life can create conflict in a relationship. Communication can break down. Resentment, confusion and frustration can take hold of the relationship – making it feel hard to break out of a vicious circle of discontent and worry. Couples can create destructive behavioural patterns that get further and further reinforced and can make it seem very difficult to see a way through to a solution.
Couples counselling offers you both a safe, non-judgemental environment (be that online or face-to-face) in which to explore your relationship. It takes you out of your normal, everyday environment and into a specially therapeutic one where conversations can be guided and supported. It helps you understand unhelpful patterns of behaviour that may have been created between you, and how to change them.
The focus of couples counselling is to:
- Create a more cooperative environment where you both feel heard
- Understand how external factors may be affecting your relationship
- Get clarity and shared agreement on what the problem(s) are
- Unlock what feel like impasses in thinking and action
- Enable open, honest and constructive communication with each other
- Rediscover the resources within the relationship and feel more able to tackle the problem(s) together
What can you expect in the session?
My role is one of facilitation, observation, reflection and, when appropriate, challenge. My goal is to help you find the answers within yourself – to guide you to a solution you both participate in creating. There is no fixed agenda of what a ‘good’ outcome looks like – this is different for every couple. I am there for you both equally – with no judgement or preconceived ideas.
What kind of problems can relationship counselling help with?
There are many different reasons that bring couples to relationship counselling. Sometimes the issue is very specific, and sometimes there is a more general sense of things not being quite right. Some common problems include:
- A loss of trust
- An affair
- Stress – possibly related to work, health or wider family issues
- Difference in desire to have children
- Different sexual needs or problems with physical intimacy
- Financial issues
- Differences in approach to parenting
- Life changes – such as moving to a new area, one of you retiring or starting a new career
Polyamory and non-monogamous relationships
Loving more than one person can be complicated. I can help with throuples (aka thrupples) and other complex polyamorous and consensual non-monogamous relationship challenges.
You don’t have to do this alone
You don’t have to wait until things feel at crisis point to reach out for support with your relationship. The earlier you are able to actively face the problems and work together on solutions, the more quickly you can move beyond feeling unhappy in your relationship. If you are worried about your relationship and feel you’re unlikely to reach a solution alone, which is totally understandable, then couple counselling could be of help to you both.
Please feel free to read my blog about relationships, or contact me if would like to book an appointment or have any questions about couples counselling.
Last Updated on 18 February, 2024